GOOOOOD morning Celebrity Roundup friends! Today is brought to you by Einstein Bros Bagels Vanilla Hazelnut Iced Coffee which I recently discovered is 1) cheap 2) delicious 3) FILLED WITH CAFFEINE 4) right downstairs. So that is that. And that? is delicious.
It goes without saying that Einstein Bros Bagel Vanilla Hazelnut Iced Coffee will not cause you to lose your ever-loving mind and get all Southern Lady with a Chip on Her Shoulder like other beverages. Maybe someone should have told that to Reese Witherspoon.
Oh yeah, have you heard? Reese Witherspoon, who some people know and love and some people (like David Spade) couldn’t pick out of a lineup, was arrested last weekend in Atlanta after verbally berating a police officer who was arresting her husband, CAA agent Jim Toth. Variety broke the story (WHAT? I know, right!?); Jim Toth was pulled over after cops saw him driving over the line around midnight last Saturday night in a 2013 Ford Focus (!!!!!!!!) . Cops reported he appeared disheveled and smelled like alcohol, which promoted the officers to administer a sobriety test. While he was performing the sobriety test in a Walgreens parking lot (!!!!) Reese Witherspoon, who was sitting in the passenger seat of the car, became more and more irritable and began hanging out the window like some drunk sorority girl.
Although the cop told her to “sit on her butt and be quiet”, Reese Witherspoon continued her tirade, accusing officers of being fake police (ummm???) As the officers arrested Jim Toth for suspicion of DUI, Reese, who had clearly been drinking a few too many and I don’t mean Einstein Bros iced coffee, exited the vehicle and said the words every celebrity thinks, but doesn’t say:
GAH do you love it or do you love it? And if you love it, please tell me on a scale of 1 to 10 how much you love it…because I love it an 11.
She continued to tell the officer he would be on national news (uh, yeah) and then said she’s allowed to get out of the car because she’s an American and can stand on American soil. To add insult to injury, TMZ recently published a surveillance video of her getting cuffed (!!!!!!!!)
I do feel a bit sorry for Reese Witherspoon, because as the old saying goes, you can take the girl out of the South but you can’t take the South out of the girl. And she’s rull embarrassed for sure; she didn’t mean for all those thoughts to come out of her mouth, y’all. Who am I to judge? I have smarted off many a time to many a person whilst stone cold sober, so things happen. However, here is a completely unfiltered look inside a celebrity’s mind, and it’s delicious…like cheesecake and strawberries. Nom. I’m eating it up with a spoon.
Justin Bieber Smokes Pot
Will this be the week we don’t talk about Justin Bieber? Nope. Let’s be frank here: Justin Bieber smokes pot. Right? I mean, how can he not? His friends smoke pot. He was basically photographed smoking pot and it was blamed on somebody else. Now, just a couple days ago, Swedish officials found pot on his tour bus. Come on, people, JUSTIN BIEBER SMOKES POT..including the very pot that was found on HIS TOUR BUS.
Oh no! the Beliebers say, There is no WAY that was Justin’s pot! UGH! Quit spreading lies about him! Really now, how do you explain this picture (other than that I am super good at PicMonkey):
One and done!
- Amanda Bynes tweeted two selfies with her newly half-shaved head. This is quickly moving into Britney territory.
- Kristin Cavallari says her fiance will tell her when she gets “too skinny.” Jay, I think you have something to say to Kristin right now….
- Mike Tyson told People that his ex cooked his pigeon and ate it for dinner excuse me WHAT? I’d love to know how that particular conversation started.
- Country legend George Jones died at age 81…see you in the big Honky Tonk in the sky.
- Gwyneth Paltrow was named People’s World’s Most Beautiful Woman; this, after she showed up on the red carpet sans undies.
- Kendra Wilkinson was in a car wreck last week that sent her to the hospital. Thankfully, two layers of airbags saved her (think about it….let that marinate….)
- Teen Mom Star Jenelle Evans was arrested for heroin and assault this week; the drugs were found in her possession when cops arrived to her home to investigate a domestic dispute with her husband, Courtland Rogers. They sound lovely…COUPLES DATE!
Have a great weekend!