I was trying to figure out what to write about in the Celebrity Roundup today. I needed a good, solid lead. “Brandi and LeAnn Rimes fighting? No…Tom Brady and Giselle Bunchen have a new baby girl? Eh. What else, what else…”
Them I’m all WAIT, HOLD THE PHONE, HOW COULD YOU FORGET ABOUT THE KATE MIDDLETON PREGNANCY. It’s like I dont’ even know myself.
It’s true. After posting on December 3 that I wouldn’t stop talking about the Royal Baby for the next 9 months, I had almost totally forgotten by December 7. I think it’s simply because I feel like the Royal Baby and a Kate Middleton pregnancy has been in the cards for such a long time, so it’s not news. Weren’t we just talking about it last week? (Yes we were.)
So anyway, in case you’re been living under a rock and/or live with a perpetual case of Mommy brain and forgot (you have so much to look forward to, Kate Middleton), the Duchess and future queen of England is pregnant. She has a crumpet in the oven…a horse in the stable…a corgi in the..whatever corgis live in when they belong to royalty. In the words of TMZ, Princess Catherine is ROYALLY KNOCKED UP (and that’s why I love TMZ.) And her baby will be better than your baby TRUST.
The Palace released a statement Monday right when I was in a meeting so everybody scooped me and I got angry about it that confirmed the Kate Middleton pregnancy while simultaneously announcing her admission to King Edward VII Hospital for Hyperemesis Gravidarum. The release said she was in the “very early stages” of pregnancy which basically means nobody expected to spill the beans this early in the game (if you’ll allow me to mix my metaphors a bit.)
At any rate, she was in the hospital for a few days and then was released looking lovely — purple pashmina, modest dress coat and a huge bouquet of yellow roses for absolutely no reason except to keep the paparazzi from snapping shots of her (still non-existant) baby bump. Listen, people, this ain’t your mama’s princess.
Really, nothing but the Kate Middleton pregnancy matters in the It’s Blogworthy Celebrity Roundup world but I cant’ do a roundup with one story, so here are a few one-and-done’s for your watercooler chatting pleasure.
- Mario Lopez and baby mama Courtney Mazza tied the knot in a lavish Mexican ceremony. You weren’t invited? Oh, sorry, sucks to be you. You’ll just have to watch “Mario & Courtney’s Wedding Fiesta” on TLC.
- Taylor Swift was out canoodling with Harry Styles, 18, of the boy band One Direction. On behalf of One Direction fans and Taylor Haytors everywhere — YOU ARE 24 QUIT DATING TEENAGERS.
- Hilary Duff, and her 8-month-old son, Luca, were out and about wearing skinny jeans. I mean, she was. The baby wasn’t. He can if he wants to but…that’s not the point. The point is, Dear Hilary, quit making us look bad. Love all moms everywhere
- Megan Fox claims she only gained 23 pounds during her pregnancy and only has 10 left to lose. Dear Megan Fox, read the letter above. Love all women everywhere.
- Lindsay Lohan is a super groupie for The Wanted now, I guess. She showed up at The Wanted concert in Philly Thursday night after getting sloppy drunk and and punching a psychic in the face last week after The Wanted concert in NYC.
- Interestingly enough, Max George of The Wanted, who is clearly Lindsay’s target, said he was 100% NOT “DATING” her. Quotes are implied, but really — I think we all know he meant to have them there.
- It takes a lot to make me hate the holidays, but this John Travolta and Olivia Newton John video collab just about did it.
Have a happy weekend!