Sometimes Friday comes and you’re wiped out.
Too much. It’s all too much. And after the third time you unload your dishwasher just to fill it back up with dirty dishes that have been sitting on your counter, you just want to get right into the car with a stash of US Weekly’s, a towel and a bag of Sun Chips and drive to the beach.
During these weeks, wouldn’t it be nice to have a super hero? Someone who can sweep in and do all the things you don’t want to do, like cleaning out the litter boxes and meticulously scrubbing a sippy cup, so you can focus on sewing beautiful dresses for your blog friends with your new (used) sewing machine.
Unfortunately, Ryan Gosling isn’t around to help me with the drudgery that is being a grownup. That doesn’t’ mean he’s not still Super Gos.
Ryan Gosling saved a British Journalist from being hit by a cab in NYC on Tuesday, adding proof to the conspiracy theory that he’s not real (there’s no way!) Laurie Penny tweeted the news Tuesday night, confirming it was actually him when a bystander said, “You lucky bitch!” Penny was attempting to cross the street when Ryan Gosling grabbed her from the oncoming traffic and said, “hey, watch out!”
The most recent act of heroism joins Ryan Gosling breaking up a street fight in NYC last year and other various and sundry good deeds to cement his status as Most Perfect Man Ever (suck on that, Bradley Cooper.)
The novelty quickly wore out for Penny, a feminist blogger, who penned a post on Gawker about the whole ordeal and tweeted, “EVERYBODY CALM DOWN ABOUT RYAN GOSLING NOW”. Not as long as he’s still going shirtless in movies and singing the My Little Pony theme in interviews, thankyouverymuch.
Hey Ryan Gosling, need someone else to save? Jaleel White needs some assistance with his piss-poor attitude and anger issues.
Jaleel White, best known as Steve Urkel on Family Matters and currently a contestant on Dancing with the Star, is in hot water safter the news broke earlier this week of a viscious fight with his dance partner, Kym Johnson. Reports say White, “flipped out” when he stepped on Kym Johnson’s toe during a rehearsal, screaming that she should quit “acting like a baby” over the accident. When Mark Ballas, another professional dancer on the show, stepped in to help, White exclaimed, “You remind me of that annoying sitcom neighbor who gets into everyone’s business!” Sheesh, Urkel, bitter much?
Later in the week, Jaleel White said, “Did I do thhhaaatt?”. Ok, he actually downplayed the fight using other words, but that’s how I translated it.
The on-air argument followed Jaleel White’s admission that his ex-girlfriend and mother of his only child filed a domestic violence suit against him, but urged that it was a ploy for money and an attempt to “steal his joy.” Like the joy you stole from Kym that was filmed for national TV, hmmm?
We’re all busy people here and nothing else can compete with this, so how about we skip right to the one liners?
- Ashton Kutcher is rumored to be playing Apple founder Steve Jobs in an upcoming biopic. Oh, good. One of the most brilliant inventors of our time played by the guy who starred in Dude, where’s my car?
- Bruce Willis and wife Emma Heming welcomed a baby girl into the world Monday. blah blah blah. Die Hard reference here. Did I mention ALL THE DISHES IN MY KITCHEN? I’m sort of preoccupied.
- The Voice Judge Adam Levine split with girlfriend, Russian model Anne Vyalitsyna. Did the smell of Axe and vodka finally get too much for you, Anne?
- Titanic star Kate Winslet said the ubiquitous theme “My Heart Will Go On” makes her want to puke. I’ve never related so much to Kate Winslet as I do at this second.
- Nick Cannon admitted his 10-month-old twins, Roc and Roe, with wife Mariah Carey are “too smart for babyproofing”. Maybe it’s not that they are too smart and more that it’s difficult to babyproof statues of golden elephants and 10000 year old Persian rugs.
- Ryan Seacrest will be co-hosting the Summer Olympics in London this year. In other news, Ryan Seacrest is an evil scientist who has perfected cloning and is probably creating a Ryan Seacrest army set to kill us all. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
- Levi Johnson, baby-daddy of Bristol Palin’s son Tripp, has gotten another girl pregnant. Somebody staple up his stuff before he makes more babies.
- Rihanna continued her attention seeking behavior by showing up at a red carpet event in pajamas. Of course, she’s doing what we all wish we could do, which is wear our pajamas 24/7.
- Snooki is back to Tweeting pictures of herself, but this time added the comment, “PREGGERS POWER. If you mess with my baby I’ll cut you.” Surely everyone will take you seriously while wearing a zebra print turban.
Have a dishes-free weekend! Now, stop over to Surferwife’s place for her Fashion Disasters and don’t forget about the Draw Something Linkup, DRAWESTIN, hosted by me and Hutch!