Dear everyone on television,
Listen people, you and i need to have a serious talk.
This is an intervention. A pigervention, in fact. Because, you see, there seems to be a ……… Situation. And I’m not talking about a poorly dressed fauxlebrity from the jersey shore.
This situations surrounds the world’s most famous (and only)felt pig.
Ok so there’s the thing. The Muppet Movie premiered in December 2011 and suddenly the muppets were like Visa — everywhere you want to be. From commercials to talk shows, miss piggy and Kermit were pimping out their movie. Which is just fantastic, right? And expected. And not at all out of the ordinary.
A few months later, lo and behold, miss piggy and Kermit showed up on Saturday night live when Jason Segal hosted. I mean, that makes sense. They even played it sort of tongue-in-cheeky, like “we’re pretending like these puppets are real people but they aren’t, hehe *wink!*”
Since then, something’s happened. Something disturbing and confusing to me. Suddenly, Miss Piggy is being treated by television and the media as if she’s a real person.
Miss Piggy appeared as both a guest and a “client” on Project Runway All-Stars. The contestants were all, “I have ALWAYS wanted to design a dress for Miss Piggy!!!!!1111″ and not one snarked about her being a puppet. Not even Anthony Williams who didn’t hesitate calling out anyone else on the show.
It’s not just her appearances — it’s the way it’s being reported.
- People Magazine discussing her “red carpet style” without mention of the hand up her butt.
- The LA Times writing a story about Miss Piggy’s war of words with Fox News.
- CBS News leading with a story about Miss Piggy and Kermit presenting at the Oscars and then mentioning Tom Cruise and Halle Berry as an aside.
- In-Style printing an entire photoshoot with the “porcine diva”.
- MSNBC posting a tutorial on how to create your own DIY Miss Piggy inspired glitter shoes to mimic the ones she “designed” and you can buy for a cool $567. (WHAT THE???) (Ok, actually I sort of want to do this.)
So here is a short list, world, of things Miss Piggy is and is not:
Miss Piggy Is
- A stuffed pig
- A puppet
- Made of felt
- Not alive
Miss Piggy Is Not
- Able to move on her own
- A living creature
- An actual pig
- A person
- A fashion icon
- A designer
- A magazine editor
I have to admit, she does have soem pretty fabulous eye lashes.
How do you feel about Miss Piggy?