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People! I’m back!
Welcome back, Amanda. We missed you but really loved your guest posters and sort of want them back because they didn’t wait until Friday to post it, so…..
Don’t be ungrateful. I have some exciting news.
Last night I was going through some old magazines and noticed seven out of ten US Weekly covers had Kim Kardashian on the cover.
Like what the heck?
Then I heard the Kardashians were planning to design Barbie dolls in their image, like they are some kind of Godesses of a race of plastic people, and also starting their own magazine because I guess every single gossip rag cover isn’t enough for them.
Brand dilution. They has it.
I made an executive decision as head curator, editor and writer of the Celebrity Roundup that beginning after the jump, It’s Blogworthy will be a Kardashian Free Zone. Yes, you heard me right. You will no longer hear a single peep about the Kardashian Klan, no matter how much they are begging for our attention.
Round of applause?
JUMP! (Get it? After the jump?)
Last week, we reported that Katy Perry and Russell Brand were fixin’ to bust up their marriage after they spent Christmas apart. And in true celebrity fashion, they announced their breakup last Friday right after we posted the Roundup (figures).
According to sources, Katy Perry and Russell Brand were at odds over their very different lifestyles. Russell reportedly didn’t appreciate Katy’s partying ways and wanted her to “tone it down” and Katy is afraid of her parents, God fearing people who thought Russell was El Diablo.
The couple are wasting no time wiping their marriage slate clean, as moving vans were already seen outside their Los Angeles home.
WOAH HOLD THE PHONE, guess who got engaged? Long time on-again-off-again couple Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake! *cue the sounds of lots of lonely 30 somethings ripping up their Justin Timberlake posters from 1998.*
After a three month split in early 2011, the couple reunited, and Justin Timberlake reportedly popped the question in the mountains of Jackson, Wyoming, while snowboarding.
Ok, is it just me, or is Jessica Biel sort of boringly perfect? Give me Britney Spears and her cray cray any day of the week.
Who needs a 2012 slate wipe? Nick Cannon, otherwise known as Mr. Mariah Carey, who was hospitalized this week for “mild kidney failure”. The couple were vacationing in Aspen for New Years when Nick Cannon became ill. Mariah was all up in his business, refusing to leave his room when asked and going so far as to lay in the bed with him, because clearly her needs are more important than his health.
He was later transferred to an LA hospital for continued monitoring. Physicians all over the world got super excited about the potential of being contacted by People magazine to discuss kidney failure.
GAH AMANDA! NOT ENOUGH! MORE CELEBRITY NEWS!
You want it? You got it!
- Elton John wants Justin Timberlake to play him in an upcoming biopic. So basically, Justin was an actor, who became a singer, who became an actor who plays a singer. I think the Mayans knew this was going to happen.
- Salma Hayek will be knighted (or chevaliered) by the president of France. That’s right, the same woman who voiced Kitty Softpaws in Puss in Boots is going to be a knight. Let that one sink in.
- Marc Anothony, aka Skelator, has rebounded after his divorce from Jennifer Lopez with Venezualian model Shannon DeLima. They announced it on the Twitter, so that’s how you know it’s serious.
- AC Slater — er, Mario Lopez — is making it legal with baby-mama Courtney Mazza. He proposed by saying he wanted the mother of his child to have their last name. Always the romantic, that one.
- Teen Mom Leah Messner is engaged to boyfriend Jeremy Calvert — and expecting their first baby together. This will be the second marriage and third child for 20 year old Messner. Honey, it’s life, not NASCAR. Slow down.
- Sinead O’Connor continued her ride on the crazy train when, after just last week announcing she was divorcing her husband of less than a month, Tweeted that they were back together after hours of makeup sex. It’s news like this that makes me wish Twitter was never invented.
- Jessica Simpson expressed her desire for a rockin’ hot post-baby bod a-la Jessica Alba on Twitter Tuesday. Girl, to look like Jessica Alba post-baby, it helps to look like her at some point BEFORE baby.
- Kanye West went on a three hour Twitter rant Wednesday night, comparing himself to Steve Jobs. ‘Cause revolutionizing the way society communicates is exactly the same as developing your own cologne.
- Demi Levato also ranted on Twitter this week, sending several messages about God and why he’s making her life so hard. Yeah, whew, God certainly hasn’t blessed you in the slightest, as you Tweet from your private cabana in St. Thomas.
YAY for Kardashian free!!!!!!!!!!! (ok, enough with the excitement)
And how did you know about my posters of JT?
Finally, dear Mariah – take care of your babies while the hubby heals. Duh.
Julie @DutchBeingMe recently posted..#Mamavation: What I’m focusing on…
Twitter: mycrazybusylife
Glad there is at least one Kardashian free zone in my life!!
Also? Celebrities are true whack jobs. Kanye like Steve Jobs? Um yeah. Not so much.
And how do you have MILD KIDNEY FAILURE?? why??
Natalie recently posted..Christmas Recap
I can’t even say Jessica Biels name without yawning.
yawn
And thank you for making this a Kardashian free zone. Those fame whores need to be stopped.
Angie@MamaInsomnia recently posted..Introducing…
Twitter: bestoffates
I am *thrilled* you’re back!!!! The Internet isn’t the same without you. And neither is celebrity gossip! Though you know of my secret love of all things Kardashian, so I’m actually saddened by your announcement. Not quite as saddened as I am by the news of Katy Perry’s divorce. Which I totally wish I was joking about but seriously, I thought those two crazy kids were going to make it!
Megan (Best of Fates) recently posted..I Tackle ‘Cause I Love (I Hug Because I’m Awkward At Introductions And Goodbyes)
Twitter: mytimeasmom
Kardashian free zone? Yah!
All those poor girls are going to be hoping that something bad happens and the engagement is called off so JT will be single again. Did you see Friends With Benefits?
I think I love you more by declaring it a K-free zone.
My friend was literally in tears when she told me that Justin Timberlake was engaged.
Because, you know, she totally had a chance.
Twitter: laurenweber84
Yay for being Kardashian free! Woo! So glad you put this together so I don’t have to watch ET
Mrs. Weber recently posted..Fab5: Ways Pinterest Inspires
Twitter: lindsTR
This post is FABULOUS!!! SO GOOD! So much happened this week.
Jessica Biel is soooo boring. Yes, she is. I picture her in a very boring wedding gown…
I’m glad I have gotten to the point where I can no longer stand the Kardashians. (Are we allowed to say that name here?) However, I still can’t delete episodes of KKTNY, even though I have no plans to watch it.
Sinead O’Connor. OY. I feel like if we Tweeted your post to her, she just might comment… apparently she loves to talk, type and overshare.
I’m totally scared of Sinead O’Connor. Like, I’m afraid she’d find me and try to set fire to my hair or something.
Laughing so hard!! Huge round of applause for the kardashian boycott. I think the straw for me was having to read about kims bangs debut this week. Now if she would shave it bald, ala britney spears, I might be interested!
paula recently posted..New Years Non-Resolutions
Twitter: MissMarinaStar
You really had me scared this morning when this wouldn’t post. What else was I going to read during nap time?
Miss Marina Star recently posted..Two Years In
YOU are so seriously seriously funny. Is that a paradox? Or an oxymoron? Or irony? It’s probably one of those.
I’ll ask the Mayans.
Love you, girl. Glad you’re back.
XO
Twitter: suitcasetricks
Kardashian Free! My kind of zone. Screw Slater. I’m a Zack girl.
Twitter: euregirlsandboy
Welcome back – we did miss you!
I think your big announcement is great. I’m definitely a Kardashian hater – I used to ignore everything about them, just skip right past any pictures or articles. My only problem with that now is that I find them so hilariously terrible. But I’m totally on board with a boycott of all things Kardashian.
I’ve thought Jessica Biel is just horribly boring for a while now. I’m doubtful they’ll actually get married. And I don’t understand how Marc Anthony’s sick looking self ever gets women.
I’m so excited about the US Weekly I hope to find in my mail today giving all the exciting details about Katy Perry & Russell Brand’s split.
Twitter: April_momof3
Ha! Love this. Your blog feeds into my need to know stuff nicely.
Oh…and did u see why Russell & Katy supposedly broke up? She was a dud in bed. Ugh!
So glad you enjoyed! I didn’t see that! But I can totally see how that would be the case, just because she seems so “sexy” but it’s probably all an act!
Twitter: AlisonSWLee
Kardashian-free celebrity news is like, the best news ever. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Twitter: kristinzas
Yeah, I wanna look like j alba too…dude, she, dude. I feel bad for jsimp
Twitter: kallaydoscope
Wait.. hang on… The Kardashians are gone! The Kardashians are gone! Thank God Almighty!!! The Kardashians are GOOOONE! Woo hoo!!!!
Also, I love Justin and Jess together. Not that any celebrity marriage ever lasts, but I sure hope they make a good run of it.
I like Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey, too, but I’m partial with the twins and all. Really, I just like Nick Cannon. I think he’s adorable.
And then there’s Kanye… the opposite of adorable. Deplorable?
i am beyond depressed about justin timberlake’s engagement.
tara recently posted..the nail files- week 1
Twitter: SaidKristin
THANK YOU for no longer indulging the Kardashians. I’m convinced that if we just all stop paying attention to them, their Mothership will return to collect them and we’ll never have to see or hear from them again.
Ans holy hell re: that teen mom chick. THREE kids at age 20? That shit would drive someone to drink… but she’s not even old enough yet!
And speaking of babies, I’m sad that my age-inappropriate crush, JT, is engaged.
Kristin @ What She Said recently posted..Dear 2012: I’d Like a Do-Over, Please
What is up with teen mom Leah?? Makes me feel like I’ve accomplished so little in my life…
Thank you for making this a safe haven away from the Kardashaian crazies. It’s a much needed breath of fresh air.
Rach (DonutsMama) recently posted..Life’s Lessons: Time to Party
What? NO Kardashian’s? I’m devestated. Psike. I currently only care about Beyonce’s baby, why Katie Perry is getting divorced, Jessica Simpson’s baby, and the future TimberBiel Wedding. And of course I hope Nick Cannon gets out of the hospital soon so he can help care for DEMbabies.
Jbeil is the perfect mixture of beige and taupe
Twitter: jmomiller
Yes!!!!! No more KDash!!!! Only if you want to talk about how she got peed on in a sex tape to be famous, ok? Ok!
[...] sometimes I actually hear before she does. Due to the fact that she has declared that she is now a Kardashian-Free zone, I will take over the Kardashian posting duties [...]
Twitter: kg_photography
Still stalking you from SITS Day
I don’t like Jessica Biel – she was the worst part of A-Team. I don’t know what it is about her, but I can’t stand her face. But I do love her body – so athletic and strong. Well, cry me a river, Timberlake is off the market for, what?, a year? I roll my eyes everytime a celebrity gets married.
Well, not everytime.
And why is Kayne West so damn angry all the time?
Kimberly, Adventures in Blogging recently posted..@DPCafe & Georgia McCabe Share the Facebook Contest Rules
Sometimes I wonder why they bother getting married when they just divorce a year later. Who has that kind of money to waste?
LOL I love it! How funny….Salma Hayek”kitty softpaws will be knighted had me laughing out loud
Jamie recently posted..Confession Friday
HA! Thank you for stopping by and so glad you enjoyed it!
Ahhhh. So that’s why this is clean of K-dash crap. Brand dilution got to ya, eh? I totally understand. (Not that my opinion counts for much, but thought I’d add it anyway.) Love your blog!
She’sWrite recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: A View of The Woods, My Norwegian Escape
Yup — TOO MUCH. That and the lovely readers of the Celebrity Roundup basically hated the K-Dash clan…I didn’t need to be one more person to promote them
Twitter: momsandmunchkin
I’m slightly embarassed to say I’m 30-something and addicted to watching Teen Mom (I should hide my name here!). I can’t believe 3 kids and 2 marriages by the age of 20 – what is she thinking? Thanks for sharing & Happy SITS Day!
Cheryl recently posted..Celebrating February National Holidays
Too funny. I’m a Real Housewives junkie myself. Happy SITS Day!
This place is amazing!!!! Dash free = heaven…I mean seriously the Barbie comment is classic. Are we thinking that Jessica Biel and JT are going to make it? Old dog, new tricks and all…but I love a good love story so I am rooting. Seriously, your blog is awesome and I must go read more. Happy SITS day!
Shannon from mynewfavoriteday recently posted..I may not see air travel the same way again, but I will see the bigger picture.
This was good! Came from SITS!
Teresa (Embracing the Spectrum) recently posted..An Important Distinction
Twitter: secretsofamom
So sick of everything kardashian too…except the snl skit!
Tara @ secretsofamomaholic recently posted..The Artist Formerly Known as 24 Hour Tara
Twitter: secretsofamom
So sick of everything Kardashian as well, but mostly kim!I feel as though her stint with marriage did it in for me. I have to say- I still like looking at her though…cant deny that she is stunningly beautiful & a great dresser to boot!
Tara @ secretsofamomaholic.com recently posted..The Artist Formerly Known as 24 Hour Tara
I’m not sure if Jessica Biel is boringly perfect or perfectly boring.
(visiting from SITS)
Lady Jennie recently posted..When I Was a Princess
TOTALLY AGREE. She’s half and half, I think. Thanks for stopping by!
[...] and Celebrity Roundup go together like fat kids and cake. Or Teen Moms and bad choices. Or the Kardashians and media saturation.Now? It’s your turn.We want to see the worst dressed bloggers in the blogosphere. Dig up your [...]
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