Well, well, well. My friend, Friday, we meet again.
Welcome. And thank you for making another appearance in our lives before someone (read: me) punches someone (read: anyone getting in the way of my three day weekend) in the face.
Remember UDO? Yeah, today is the day I’m going to try and get a dance party started. I don’t know if it will fly, but considering at the time of posting, my office will be preparing for approximately 86 hours not at work, so chances are pretty good.
And who wouldn’t want to raise their hands in the air (like they just don’t care) with this lovely vision:
On to the super fabulous Labor Day edition of Celebrity Round-Up!
Know what I don’t have time for anymore? Watching awards shows. And boy does that give me an extra strength sad face for many reasons, but mainly because I have to Google all the good performances and dramz the next day. I am especially upset when I miss big celebrity news as a result of my lameness and inability to turn the television onto any channel other than Bravo.
News, like, for instance, how Beyonce and Jay-Z are expecting a little diva (divo? male equivalent?)
The couple dropped this happy little bombshell on the red carpet of the Video Music Awards this past Sunday and MTV promptly tweeted it with all the OMGs and !!! they could muster. She later announced it to the audience (and world) by tearing off her sequined blouse, rubbing her belly and saying, “I want you to feel the love that’s growing inside me.
Most dramatic pregnancy announcement EVER. And one that broke Twitter usage records: 8,868 tweets per second were sent following that little spectacle.
Also seen at the Video Music Awards: Jay-Z refusing to clap for Chris Brown and Lady GaGa attending as her alter ego, Jo Calderone, complete with a pompadour, cigarette and fake penis. If you don’t click on anything else in this recap, click on those two words.
In non-VMA news (“Thank God she shut up about the VMAs finally!”):
- Madonna has a 53rd birthday party that consisted of lots of things, but most importantly making out with her 24 year old boyfriend (GET IT GIRL!)
- Taylor Swift and Reese Witherspoon finally have something else in common besides being southern. They met and talked about how vain their ex-in-common Jake Gyllenhaal is! (Hollywood is just like my sorority. Lots of “ex-in-common” going on there, too.)
- Justin Bieber has a Fararri. Oh wait, that’s not the news. Justin Bieber wrecked his Fararri. I think the fact that a 17 year old boy has a Fararri is news enough for me, though.
- Alyssa Milano gave birth to a son with husband David Bugliari and gave him a name that he probably won’t be embarrassed to tell people 10 years from now!
- ABC announced this season’s DTWS stars, including “gun guy” Ron Artest, Nancy Grace and TWO Chmerkovskiy BROTHERS!!!!
- Some badass woman PUNCHED A BLACK BEAR IN THE FACE to save her dog (not celebrity news, but fun nonetheless.)
Now that you’ve read all this stuff, please head yourself right over to Mama Insomnia, where Angie has been kind enough to host me as I talk about a very important health issue. GO NOW your health depends on it!
Have a fun weekend!