It’s Friday, and I’m beat.
Everyone used to say to me, “Amanda, just when you think you have it all figured out with your baby, he’ll do something to throw you for a loop.”
I bragged about what an ah-maze-ing sleeper he is. I came in to work refreshed. I shrugged my shoulders when another Mom said to me, “Mine is still up all night!”
Now Baby Blogworthy’s brain is a-churnin’ and he wants nothing more than to a) sit in his crib and look around b) practice crawling at 3:30 and c) hang out in his Mama’s arms during the wee hours.
To these things, I say NOOOO! Say it ain’t so! Bring back that baby who fell right to sleep at 8:30 pm and woke up refreshed at 7:30 am. I know he’s in there, somewhere, just temporarily replaced with a child who knocks the white noise machine (which, by the way, is further out than he could possibly have reached, confirming my suspicion that he has go-go gadget arms)off the table beside his crib just for pure spite.
Baby Blogworthy’s current sleep regression isn’t the only thing I’m pulling out the NOOOOO button for these days.
This week, we learned Dirty Dancing, the classic dance movie that inspired millions of 1980s teens to proudly place Patrick Swayze posts on their walls will be getting a make-over. Although the characters haven’t been cast yet, it was announced that Kenny Ortega, choreographer for High School Musical will be directing the movie. Jennifer Grey, star of the original flick, can’t wait to see it.
If Zac Effron makes an appearance, I’ll cut someone.
On the small screen, George Lopez got his own “Say it ain’t so!” news when it was announced his late-night talk show, Lopez Tonight, was getting the ax. The show, in it’s second season, averages 400,000 viewers and was therefore cancelled due to low ratings. The curtain call for the show was last night.
Talk about not letting the door hit ya on the way out. What on earth are those 400k George Lopez fans going to do now? Sleep? Find something else to do while they get their drink on? I’d hate to think George Lopez single-handedly kept 400,000 lil hoolis off the street.
Is a break-up imminent? Say it ain’t so! Why, God, why do you allow beautiful couples who found love after one chose the other after 6 weeks, from a group of 25 other men with whom she dated/canoodled/swapped spit. WHY? Is there no justice in this world?
Actually, she’s postponing the wedding because of her recent leg surgery and doesn’t want to limp down the aisle. Plus, she hasn’t been able to work out and nobody wants a fat bride, right Kelly Osborne?
Oh. Well that’s not nearly as dramatic as I’d hoped. Bummer.
Finally, Kris Jenner, Mom of the famous K-dash sisters, has been pressuring her daughters to have more babies. More. MOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111
She told Us Weekly:
“I would love more grandchildren. [Kourtney Kardashian's son] Mason is the love of our lives, and he is so much fun, but there’s only one Mason to go around. It would be nice if we had some more.”
I think there’s one thing we can all agree on: The world needs lots of things — peace, the end of starvation, a Project Runway All Stars in which Austin Scarlett designs beautiful and unwearable dresses — but what it doesn’t need is more Kardashians.
Have a safe and happy weekend, friends!