Celebrity Round-up: The nuts and their shells

You know, even the best celebrity recapper needs a break once and awhile.

Bad ones like me do, too.

While I take a day to enjoy the Tampa Zoo with my smiley baby (fingers crossed this is the case because really, mid-summer in Florida at the zoo is really just a recipe for meltdowns), my girl Angie, fellow 30 Rock fan, Sonic lover and preggo from Mama Insomnia, is holding down the fort. To know her is to love her. Enjoy

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I have a horrible weakness for celebrity gossip, so I am extremely excited to be guest posting this weeks Celebrity Roundup. And let me tell you all, this week was no easy feat.

In terms of celebrity gossip, I find, there are usually 2 categories of celebrity news: Bombshells, those big OMG stories & scandals and Nutshells, which is pretty much everything else.

This week, was no doubt, mostly filled with nutshells.

This weeks theme: Broken engagements from “celebrities” that most of us didn’t know/care were engaged in the first place.

First up, there was the “shocking” split of Kat Von D and Jessie James. Shocking to whom, I’m not sure. But that’s neither here nor there. According to Jesse, the reason for their split was the commute.

Really Jesse??

I get that long distance relationships are hard and all, but are you really expecting us all to believe that your breakup is because of your commute and not because you like to sleep with Nazi hookers and are in the midst of a bitter custody battle with your crazy porn star ex??
Sheesh…the nerve of some people.

Next up on the list, reports that Kristin Cavalleri and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler have also broken off their engagement.

While I won’t say that the news itself is shocking, I was a bit taken aback by the fact that it was Cutler that reportedly dumped Cavallari.

Even more shocking?? Reports that “Cutler was too controlling”. I find this particularly odd because as a Chi-town gal and a devoted Bear’s fan,  I was under the impression that Jay Cutler was unable to control anything. But I stand corrected. Apparently he is much better suited for controlling women than he is a football.

In other news you probably didn’t care about, Runaway Bride Crystal Harris has been blasting ex-fiance Hugh Hefners skills in the bedroom.She reportadly told Howard Stern that 85 year old Hefner, “didn’t last long” and that she “just wasn’t turned on by him” the one time they had sex.

Again, I say, Really???

Does this girl really expect us to be shocked that an 85 year old man wasn’t up to the same sexual level as a 25 year old girl?  At least he can take a little blue pill to help him along.

Sadly though, stupidity, has no cure.

Thanks so much Angie! If you haven’t already, visit her over at Mama Insomnia. I big time love her!