Las Vegas: Two Tales of One City

Las Vegas. Disney World for adults.  What happens in Vegas….you know the rest.

I have many fond and not so fond memories from two separate trips to Sin City, so gather round ye olde blog, friends, and let me weave a couple tales of vacations past.

The first time I went to Vegas was with my ex-boyfriend, the Bowler. He financed our trip by spending many a night playing poker online with real cash money. I’m 80% sure it was illegal and am 100% sure it was sketchy and off-shore. I also thought it was crazy until his winnings allowed us to eat at nice places and go to shows, then I didn’t care as much.

We stayed at the Monte Carlo. I thought I would be super trendy and cute, so I brought only high heeled boots. All I knew of Las Vegas was what I’d learned through movies and TV, where sexy women are wearing sequined dresses and playing craps and drinking champagne. So basically, all I had were heels or nothing — not even a slipper to cover my tootsies while I ran to the ice machine or something.

You know what there is a lot of in Vegas? WALKING. For miles I walked in those stupid high heeled boots. I’m really stubborn and hated to be wrong, so I pretended like all was FINE just FINE, I walk in boots ALL THE TIME SO SHUT UP. No, I always walk this way IT’S NOT A LIMP.

Oh, and I also need to mention it was December and I was pale as a ghost. I thought I’d brighten up my complexion with a little trip to the tanning bed before we left, ended up laying too long for my first visit in hopes of speeding up the process, and was shedding much like a snake the entire trip.

Bleeding, mangled toes? Check! Red, peeling skin? Check! Sounds great, right?

It got better.

Stampede machine. How cute is that buffalo?

We were walking through the casinos one night, hopping from one to the next and looking out for my favorite slot machine, STAMPEDE! (If you got three buffaloes in a row, it said stampede and went haywire. Guess you had to be there?) I found one and threw a couple quarters in and didn’t win, so we moved on. A few casinos away, I realized I’d left my purse at the machine. We ran back and it was gone, long gone, in a casino of all places. I didn’t have much money, but I did have my cell phone, lipstick, a few other odds and ends. By the grace of God, I had my license in my pocket and left my car keys and all but one credit card in the hotel. We talked to security and filed a report, realizing I’d probably never see those things again. The remaining card was canceled and I proceeded to have a meltdown of epic proportions.

That night, while I was crying my eyes out over my misfortune, my ex-boyfriend spent hours in the Monte Carlo casino gambling. No surprise that relationship didn’t last.

This trip happened right around Christmas. A few days after we got home, right before New Year’s Eve, a packaged arrived at the condo, addressed to me. I opened it and it was my purse with everything still inside, less the handful of change. The purse included a note that said simply, “I found your purse and used the change to send it back.” No identifying information, no return address.

It was sort of a Christmas miracle.

The second trip was a few years later, my last spring break trip while I was a carefree college student. I believe it was 2004, and I went with my BFF Candace, who was from a small town in West Virginia and at that point had never flown. Ever. After the fun flight on a SOUTHWEST AIRLINES plane, we landed in Vegas and proceeded to have a blast for four days. I wont’ get into details because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right? but a few things I’ll never forget:

  • Dancing with Midwestern boys on spring break to Britney Spears’ Toxic so they would buy us a beer
  • Stopping by McDonalds at three in the morning for a burger and Candace proclaiming it the BEST BURGER SHE’D EVER HAD
  • Walking for a dance club back to our hotel armed with nothing but my chain metal belt, which I claimed I’d use as a deadly weapon if anyone tried to “mess with us”
  • Calling our friend who’d flaked out at the last minute, leaving a message that said she’s missing out on a lot of hot guys and then marking the message as urgent
  • How blonde and skinny I was in 2005
Blonde. Skinny. Belly shirt? I thought I was fat here BTW.

Anyone else have some Las Vegas memories?

This is part of a Studio 30 Plus prompt! Are you thirty? Word Nerdy? Go now!

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19 comments to Las Vegas: Two Tales of One City

  • JMJE

    I also went on my first Las Vegas trip with an ex-boyfriend. We didn't make it. But at least I didn't lose my wallet. But I also went again later with my husband to visit one of my friends who lives there. A lovely time was had by all. I then went again for an amazing bachelorette party last year to visit the same friend. Craziness insued but we won't talk about that here. Wearing high heels for a night out in Vegas is not the best idea. I made several wardrobe changes on my last trip so I could switch in to flipflops. Overall I enjoy a nice trip to Vegas every now and then but I think it helps that I usually stay at my friends house and then on the strip for only like one night.

  • Hutch

    It's amazing how our skinniest times we still weren't satisfied! I love the long hair, it's sooo college :)

    Also, I love when good deeds happen that restore my faith in people.

  • Aimee

    OMG I have way too many Las Vegas memories to count. Being from Southern CA and being obsessed with Vegas means I go every couple of months… especially now that I also go for work.

    That first trip sounds like it sucked so Im glad you 1) got out of that relationship 2) got your purse back and 3) had a better trip the next time you went.

    i think we are all guilty at one point of walking in heels too long just to prove a point haha. I know I do it way too often.

    Second trip sounds like an amazing and typical Vegas experience.

    Lets see some of my memorable moments:
    -Falling up the escalator and proclaiming to everyone that they should go to Fat Tuesdays for Jello Shots
    -Telling a midget to shhh and then exclaiming that I wanted to hire him for my parties.
    -Finding friends in the hotel hot tub and going out partying with them that night
    -Shot tree with my mom
    -Making friends with the dealers and players around the blackjack table and all of us taking shots (dealers excluded)
    -Club Hopping (my record is 5 clubs in 1 night spanning 1.5 miles apart-yes we walked it)


  • Mama Insomnia

    Ahh Vegas, I had many a fun times there. Minus the time I almost passed out from dehydration and heat after a long night of drinking.
    And good god what I wouldn't give for my 2005 body back…

  • KLZ

    I'm going to come right out and say it: I think you look better now. Happier like.

  • Foreign Mama

    We actually got engaged there, on the fake Eiffel Tower and proceeded to go to a topless show after that (my sister's idea). I had the same issue with wearing heels all the time..
    We are planning another trip this summer, when the LO is big enough to stay with my parents for a few days. This time, I am bringing flip flops
    (I guess when you are married, you are not trying to impress anyone LOL)

  • Liz

    oh, i love this! and those drunken proclamations are always so epic. i got chills about your purse being mailed back. i've only been to vegas once, but like you, learned about the walking.

  • tara

    I went to vegas in college. We were poor and pretty much had no money to spend on anything while we were there. We stayed at the imperial palace which is centrally located, but not fancy at all! I really want to go back to vegas on a grown up budget! I think the experience would be totally different!

  • Domesticated-Bliss

    This is hilarious :) Vegas is awesome! Thanks for sharing your story! When I went I was sick but I sucked it up and schlepped my but all up and down the strip!

  • Cathy

    I've never been to Vegas. I guess I should go at least once. I don't like lots of people though, so….yeah.

    I can't believe someone returned your purse!! That is epic. Yay for humanity!

  • Bill

    I actually think there are more decent people in Vegas than the city gets credit for. I lost a camera there, and someone turned it into the Casino Authorities. Very cool of whoever it was.

    Also, I don't know if you've heard, but Dickens references? Not a fan.

  • The Random Blogette

    I hope one day to make it to Vegas! It is our dream! My cousin and his wife go for vacation there every year. They say that it isn't that expensive but then again they make more money. So whatevs. And can I just tell you that I looked just like that in 1997! We could've been twins. Yeah, by 2005 I was pregnant.

  • Crazy Shenanigans-JMO

    I can't believe someone actually sent you your bag back! That was probably the best thing to come out of that trip!

  • Ms.Wasteland

    I've only been to Vegas twice. The first time I went with The TO and I hated it. Thought it was boring standing around while he gambled away our non-existent money.

    The second time I went with my blog buddies (and my gay prom date) and we had a BLAST.

    I'm not sure what that says about my life…

    PS Look at your skinny self. Don't you want to go back and feed that girl a sammich?

  • SmartBear

    Ahhh…look at you in 2005! I know what you me. Isn't it funny how you look back and think "man! I was cute! Why didn't I know I was cute THEN?" I think about that every time I want to criticize myself and my I'm-not-pregnant belly. Because when I am 80 I will think I looked HOT.
    Anyhooo…my first trip to Vegas was my LAST. I thought I would LOVE Vegas. It was my BFF's wedding. She got married at the Paris hotel. I had a smokin' hot dress. I was newly engaged myself. Turns out? I LOATHE Vegas. I had no desire to gamble and everything felt like a cheap desinger knock off. I sat by the pool the whole time and sucked back some giant frozen drink that was WAY overpriced. I have vivid memories of running through the airport to get out of Vegas whilst slot machines were blaring in my hung over ears at 6 a.m. I never need to go back.
    P.S. thanks for your sweet comments about the tot's rockstar party!

  • Erin

    I've had good and bad experience there, too, but overall I love it. It's a blast at New Year's and for bachelorette parties. We went to the Thunder from Down Under once and it was HILARIOUS. I went last October with my husband and we saw a couple shows and went to a couple nice dinners and just had a really great time! I'm ready to go back …


    I LOVE it! I've still not made it to Vegas, but like your dream with the boots, I still feel like I might need to wear sleeved-mini dresses for the entirety of the vacay. Oh dreams vs. reality.

  • Lisa

    I've never been to Vegas, but I swear I'll make it someday!!

  • MrsJenB

    I've never been to Vegas! But I want to go. Someday.

    Oh, how I miss getting drunk and leaving messages for people. I really do, no sarcasm. Those were the days.

    I'm sure you're just as cute now as you were then!

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