The post in which it becomes clear money can’t buy brains

Did y’all watch the Super Bowl? Wait, let me get more specific. Did y’all watch the Super Bowl commercials?

Remember this one?

That baby, he’s so cute and clever and good with money. And what a player! Milk-a-holic, isn’t that adorable, because they are babies, see, they aren’t old enough to drink; and it’s a derogatory statement towards that little 8-month-old Lindsey baby who is obviously a dirty boyfriend stealer. Calling her a whore would be crossing some sort of line, I think. That’s why the ad agency made the choice to call her a milk-a-holic instead.


Let’s just laugh together for a moment over this super cute ad while E-Trade’s ad agency reps roll around naked in piles of money.

Now, what are your thoughts right now? Are you thinking about Lindsey Lohan?

Because Lindsey Lohan thinks you are.

That’s right, according to US Weekly, (because where else do you get news?) Lohan is fixin’ to sue E-Trade $100 million for using her name in this commercial. The one in which two babies fight over another baby. And one baby happens to be named Lindsey.

From the article:

“Many celebrities are known by one name only, and E-Trade is using that knowledge to profit,” Lohan’s lawyer, Stephanie Ovadia, said in a statement to the New York Post. “They’re using her name as a parody of her life. Why didn’t they use the name Susan? This is a subliminal message. Everybody’s talking about it and saying it’s Lindsay Lohan.”

Really? Everybody? And by everybody, does she mean the small sphere of flunkies and paid friends with whom she spends her time?

I find the fact that the lawyer said it was a “parody of her life” more disturbing than the same name aspect. Basically, Lohan is admitting that she’s an alcoholic man stealer; that the above commercial reflects her life accurately enough that it would be infringing on her image. Really? Three babies are ruining your image. Enough so that you need $1 million for retribution from, what? Lost income? From the roles you lost because E-Trade was making fun of you? Because this whole, “Lindsey Lohan is an alcoholic slut” angle hasn’t already been beaten to death in the media over the past three years. I mean this lawsuit is coming from a person who has been arrested and been in rehab many times. The damage has been done, sister. Lindsey Lohan hasn’t worked since 2006, but somehow has found all kinds of cash to buy drugs and booze and life the high life (PUN INTENDED). Wait — maybe that’s why she’s suing.

In other news, I just purchased a domain name but I have forgotten everything I know about domains and I can’t figure out how to make it go to my blog. So anybody who can help, email me. Please and thank you!

In other, other news, go over to Naked Cupcakes and tell Sarah what she smells like!

In other, other, other news, the Boob Nazi is giving away jewelry in honor of her 1000th post. One thousand posts of pure awesome. You can’t beat it. And if you email her and she emails you back, your inbox will have a message from “Boob”. Awesome.

In other, other, other, other news, have you heard of Lady Bloggers? It’s where I found a crap ton of awesome bloggers. If you are 1) a lady (you don’t even have to be *ladylike*, just have lady parts) and 2) a blogger, go over there and apply and tell them I sent you!

In other, other, other, other, other news, I have been at work early enough to park in the lot three days in a row. Threepeat! Badass!

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38 comments to The post in which it becomes clear money can’t buy brains

  • The Step In Mom. . .

    I saw this on TV… she was comparing herself to Cher and Oprah… sorry she does not have one-name fame! What a loser… And no she didn't even cross my mind when I saw this add.

  • Miranda Tucci

    I heard about that! I thought it was insane as well..LoL.

  • Jamie Jenson

    Ok, I've seen this commercial oodles of times and I laugh every single time I watch it. I never once made the connection to dumbo Lindsay. She must be really hard up for cash if she's trying to "milk" them for some dough. Pun intended.

  • Allyson

    In other, other, other, other, other, other, other news…I should have been at Sam's like an hour ago but I'm still sitting on my bed reading blogs so maybe finding more awesome bloggers is bad news bears right now. ;)

    I don't think "Lindsay" can actually sue over image infringement because this wasn't all girl babies. Isn't she a lesbian now? Not that I'm judging…but everyone knows she resides in the Girldom so I don't think anyone would believe this is about her. She really needs to have a long Come-to-Jesus talk with Brittney Spears about how this road only leads to abandonment by your fans and a dark, dark road back to stardom. If ever.

    In other, other, other, other, other, other, other, other, other news…just learned from Kelly at Dare to be Domestic that Corey Haim died. Take a lesson, Lindsay!

  • JennyMac

    This ad is so funny. And LiLo must know they are not talking about her bc milkaholic would have been "crazy betch."

  • KingstonsQueen

    Is she for real? Lindsey Lohan never once crossed my mind when I saw those commercials. There's no possible way it could be her excssive partying, diva-like attitude, disappearing figure (ahem, coke head::cough, cough::) or showing off her Britney that ruined her reputation. No sirree. E-Trade did it. Damn you, E-Trade!

  • Rene W.

    That was a brilliantLY funny post… amazing she can bring such a light-hearted commercial down to her level. Oh please!

  • OG

    I knew that baby reminded me of somebody – now I see the resemblance. I think the reason I didn't realize it at first was that she's not dressed slutty enough or making out with another chick for attention.

    Lindsay Lohan either A)Doesn't care if she wins the suit, because she just wants to be in the spotlight again B) needs the money because she's spent all of hers on booze, hookers and black-tar heroin.

    Either way – Lame.

  • foxy

    I heard about this yesterday and COULDN'T BELIEVE IT. I mean, really? I hate her. With a passion.

  • Hutch

    She really needs to lay off the crack…seriously!

  • My Husband's Watching TV...

    Get a life Lohan! I think I had about 20 Lindsays in my graduating class…get over yourself!

  • JMJE

    I don't think I have ever reffered to Lindsay Lohan as just Lindsay maybe LiLo but no, not Lindsay. I saw that on the Today show this morning. She's crazy.

  • Scraps

    Registering a domain reserves it for you, but you still have to host it somewhere. Depending on where you registered, hosting may have come with (part of a package–pay for hosting, get reg free sort of thing) or may need to be done separately. The host's function, if I understand what you want, would be to forward/redirect anyone who goes to to and would be done through your webpanel.

  • Rene W.

    Yes – heehee… I love adverbs too & will probably not stop using them :D

  • Daisygirl

    I love that commercial!!! So didn't think of Lindsay Lohan while watching it though…say what?
    She's a skank and attention whore and if that baby was supposed to be Lindsay she would have red hair and be covered in freckles…than maybe she could make a stink over it! haha!

  • itsybitsyknitsy

    Oh dear – shes an idiot. And to be fair – shes broke – hence the law suit… get some money. so she couldnt buy brains if she wanted too!

  • Linda

    In other news…..No one was paying much attention to that commerical anymore. Until now. Good going Lindsay.

  • Crazy Shenanigans

    I heard about this yesterday and she's insane. I mean really….no one was thinking of her. Plus how can she be a man stealer when no one will date her and she's dating ladies….

  • mommaof4wife2r

    wow…lots of stuff!!! i have a few websites and bought domains too. can be tricky! i'm stopping by from SITS!

  • Sarah

    You are an amazing source of bloggy information.

    AND unselfish, because look who is sending people over to compete for a Starbucks gift card? You are, that's who.

    Doesn't la Lohan have a girlfriend? How can she be a man stealer? Pretty sure she's going to lose that suit.

  • Amanda

    Correct to all of you who mentioned that it should have been 3 girl babies instead of one boy and two girls because yes, I did think she was a lesbian, too! She is a HOT MESS, y'all.

  • tootie

    First, I didn't think for a second that it was about Lohan. (After all, plenty of people have the name Lindsey!)

    Second, I think there are a lot worse names to be called than a milkaholic :)

  • Salt

    Well no. I didn't think of Lindsay Lohan at all. Now if the babies had been talking about cocaine, lesbians, and rehab then yes maybe I would have thought of her a little.

    That is the most ridiculous thing I've read all day.

  • Em Static

    I read about that last night and I thought "So she's saying she's a drunken whore… Not only that, but she apparently owns the copyright on being a drunken whore..?"

  • Monique-aka-Surferwife23

    I could barf on Lindsey right now.

    Who does that? I mean who really thinks they can pull off the one name thing besides Madonna? Or Cher? Or RuPaul?


  • Daffy

    …you don't even have to be a lady just have lady parts….

    Niiiice! I do believe that qualifies me :O)

    I'm not going to comment on the Lohan crapola…she deserves no more lime light….

  • Sarah With Scissors

    I am going to sue everyone who ever uses the word awesome. Because clearly when you think of awesome you think of me. It is just obvious.

    No but seriously, this is hilarious. And I can't believe Lindsay is so self conscious that a commercial with three babies has caused her to go crazy. Wait, she was a crazy before. Ah well… it's giving me a laugh so whatever.

    And if I wasn't already a member of lady bloggers (how I found you) I would totally sign up and use your name. I think you should totally get cred. And I'm totally emailing Boob Nazi because I want an email from her that is from "Boob".

    You have so made my day.


  • Tracie

    My husband was reading the article to me yesterday and I had no idea what commercial it was refering to. I think it's safe to say that she is completely nuts and trying to drum up publicity. Maybe she should find another girlfriend.

  • Meagan@Megs7827

    Hi! I'm a new follower! I heard about Lindsay. She is one crazay biotch!

  • SmartBear

    Oh Amanda…sometimes you make me laugh so hard, my face hurts. What if the baby had been named "Paris" or "JLo"….you know, something more unique. Cause I know a whole gaggle of Lindsay Hos….I'm just sayin.

  • Uptown Girl

    ok you have 28 comments so far so therefore I can't read them all and I'm prob about to copy someone. oops.
    1- the commercial was dumb in my opinion (and i usually like etrade babies). I didn't like them turning babies into sluts.
    2- I never ever ever would've even thought about Lohan if you hadn't mentioned it. "Many celebrities are known by one name only"… Madonna, Sting, Cher, Britney… NOT LINDSAY LOHAN.

    I might sue too bc it was a parody of my life. I love dairy…

  • Suzanne Westover

    I'm gonna throw down a lawsuit on Heidi Klum. She stole my look; it's just hard to prove…cause, like, she's got it now…

  • Alissa

    Yeah, I was totally confused about this when I heard about it. Lohan needs to get over herself!

  • Writing Without Periods!

    that girl needs a hobby. Oh, brother…

  • The Random Blogette

    I totally heard about this! What a fame crazy ho! She hasn't been talked about in a while so why not stir up some controversy to get her name in the press. I have decided that anytime someone uses the word random, i will sue them because I am The Random Blogette! And whenever someone talks about anything random it is so about me. That girl needs to get over herself! Oh and I need to get over to Lady Bloggers!

  • Jackie

    "hot mess"….truer words were never spoken about her. If she and Britney both live to be 40 it will be a miracle!

  • Sarah Beth

    I posted this link on my fb and said if Li-Lo wins this case, I will lose all faith in the justice system. Ridic, I say! Simply ridic.

  • [...] by WP Greet Box WordPress PluginThis blog has a long standing tradition of making fun of Lindsay Lohan. She’s a regular on the Celebrity Roundup and I’ve even featured her as the hottest of [...]

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